What bonus would be balanced against restricting a changeling's Shapechanger trait to only work once per day during a long rest?

Question

I am playing as a changeling in a new campaign where every officially published races are accepted. We told the DM the races and classes we wanted to play in advance and he was OK with it. However, during the first session, he said that my changeling will only be able to change their appearance once per day, during a long rest.

I am going to try to negotiate a bonus in exchange for this restriction.
There are two options I'd like to propose, but don't know which one would be fair:

1. The Actor feat (PHB, p. 165) - So even if my character can't change very often, they are very good at it.
2. The Unsettling Visage trait, from the UA: Eberron Races version of the changeling - It's in theme and could be fun to describe.

I like "Actor" more, but would it be balanced to get it at first level?

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After exchanging a few messages with our DM, I've decided to propose a third option: another way to limit my character's power. I've asked about it as a separate question:
Is this modified version of the changeling's "Shapechanger" trait fair?

Answer 1

Is actor balanced at first level?

Let's take a look. The only official race that grants a feat, and the only official way to get a feat at 1st level, is Variant Human. The variant Human get's a +1 to two different ability scores, a skill proficiency and a feat. Is +2 Charisma, +1 to one ability score of your choice, a once per day shape change and two skills equivalent to +1 to two scores and a skill? It is obviously not. Let's look at balancing this. Actor gives +1 to Charisma. Would it be fair to say that without that +1 Charisma, actor is just half a feat? (As ASI's are either +2 to ability scores or a feat). Then, is all of the changeling features, and half a feat, equivalent to the Variant Human traits, minus the feat? Well, not quite. Changelings already have one more point of ASI than Variant Humans, or half a feat. The last thing that I would do to balance this is change the Changelings Charisma bonus from +2 to +1. Now is it balanced? I think so.

In my opinion, it would be balanced to take the actor feat, without the +1 boost to Charisma. (As this was your first pick, I will not bother answering the unsettling visage portion of the question.)

Hope this helps!

Answer 2

I think the answer by TheDragonOfFlame is a fair assessment and I also recommend going with the Actor feat without the +1 to Charisma if you are going to go with that option. What I would more strongly recommend is talking with your DM about why he is restricting what is literally the defining characteristic of your race of choice.

If he is afraid of your character abusing the ability, ask him to clarify how he thinks you might do that. I can definitely see the occasional edge case where you might do so, but I doubt it would make much difference to typical play. In fact, I would argue that it would create opportunities for your character to do some fun espionage work.

It might be worth mentioning to him that changing your appearance is only one part of a disguise, and barring some magical means, costume changes can be quite difficult to pull off on the fly. There is also acting the part and sometimes pulling off appropriate dialog or having to know some password or even a trivial fact about who you are impersonating can prove to be fatal to this kind of subterfuge. Remind him that your success at these things is not automatic (though, as a bard you will certainly have advantages to such things).

Most of all, try and come to an understanding between both of you that makes you both happy. Make sure you're wanting to play/run the same kind of game and if something is off, find a compromise. Even a few sessions in, you're better off adjusting things to have fun than slogging through something you don't enjoy.