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  1. Study the Inkblot Test.
  2. Read the anecdote.
  3. Determine the name of the establishment.


enter image description here Blots are not necessarily scaled relative to each other.


So I was really {3} one day, so {3} off to get me a {5} sandwich.

I told the guy behind the counter,"I don't mean to {3}, but I heard {3} really good sandwich here, is that right?"

He said: "{5} wait a sec? You haven't even taken a number yet!"

There was this {5} skateboard, wearing a {3} tie looking at the rotisserie. I said, "I can't see the display. Can {4} your neck and {5} what it says?"

He ignored me. "What's this, then? They just stick meat on a {3} drip {5} on it?"

I responded, "Yeah, that stuff can really {2} the flavor."

I heard the lunch-man asking a customer: "Do you want this order {3} or should I put it on a {3} plate for you?"

As I was leaving the store that {4} afternoon, I realized that I didn't get any change. {1} me!

That's OK. I'm just happy to know that my sandwich {2}. Authentic food is the only kind {2}!

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    $\begingroup$ The answer is "No." The answer at the end of the penultimate line does not start with "F." $\endgroup$
    – Chowzen
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 13:45

4 Answers 4

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Complete answer -

Letters/blots: 

A  Chile
B  Isle of Man (Thanks @TobySpeight and @m1gp0z)
C  Guyana
D  Ukraine
E  Turkey
F  Sudan
G  Togo
H  Israel
I  Poland
J  China
K  Czech (Republic)
L  Jamaica
M  Sweden
N  Russia
O  Hungary
P  Greece
Q  Iran
R  Kenya
S  Egypt

Anecdote:

So I was really huNgary one day, so irAn off to get me a turkEy sandwich.
I told the guy behind the counter,"I don't mean to ruSsia, but I heard jaMaica really good sandwich here, is that right?"
He said: "kenyA wait a sec? You haven't even taken a number yet!"
There was this guyaNa skateboard, wearing a suDan tie looking at the rotisserie. I said, "I can't see the display. Can ukrAine your neck and czecH what it says?"
He ignored me. "What's this, then? They just stick meat on a poLand drip greeCe on it?"
I responded, "Yeah, that stuff can really sWeden the flavor."
I heard the lunch-man asking a customer: "Do you want this order toGo or should I put it on a chIna plate for you?"
As I was leaving the store that chiLe afternoon, I realized that I didn't get any change. Egypt me!
That's OK. I'm just happy to know that my sandwich iSrael. Authentic food is the only kind iSle of man!

Letters ordered by appearance in the anecdote:

NAESMANDAHLCWGILESS

Letters ordered alphabetically by blot letter:

LSNAEDGSLIHMWSNCAAE

So...still dunno the final answer. Terrible attempts below:

Ham and Swiss Lace Glen
Nameless Sandwich Gal
Sand a Legless Manwich
Changeless Maw Island
Ms. Lasagna-Chew Island
Smelling Canada's Welsh
@Chawssin am SE LLEGAND!!!

For real, though:

My friend [Sam (and a Legless Winch)] agree that it should actually be
Magellan's Sandwiches

OK, it was actually @aynber! Thanks for nudging (then shoving) me along. =)
May you never catch

Ms. Swanglan's Head Lice

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    $\begingroup$ B is a British Crown dependency, but that's not helping me with the letters. $\endgroup$
    – Toby Speight
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 15:58
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    $\begingroup$ My first thought was "to value", but the shape didn't match... $\endgroup$
    – Toby Speight
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 16:02
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    $\begingroup$ I think I see a kind of food mentioned in the story, if the letters are to be anagrammed. $\endgroup$
    – Toby Speight
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 16:05
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    $\begingroup$ @aynber Thanks...but clearly I can't. Somebody else should definitely go for it though. $\endgroup$
    – hagfy
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 16:38
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    $\begingroup$ @hagfy, I dig all those names. If I had endless resources, I might start each of those as franchises :) $\endgroup$
    – m1gp0z
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 16:40
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Following @hagfy's answer, the name of the establishment is

Magellan's Sandwiches

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Partial:

The ink blots are mostly as follows:

A: Chile
B:
C: Guyana
D: Ukraine
E: Turkey
F: Sudan
G: Togo
H: Israel
I: Poland
J: China
K:
L:
M: Sweden
N: Russia
O: Hungary
P: Greece
Q: Iran
R: Kenya
S: Egypt

And the story goes something like

So I was really {HUNGARY} one day, so {IRAN} off to get me a {TURKEY} sandwich.
I told the guy behind the counter,"I don't mean to {RUSSIA}, but I heard {?canada (can eat a)?} really good sandwich here, is that right?"
He said: "{KENYA} wait a sec? You haven't even taken a number yet!"
There was this {GUYANA} skateboard, wearing a {SUDAN} tie looking at the rotisserie. I said, "I can't see the display. Can {UKRAINE} your neck and {??} what it says?"
He ignored me. "What's this, then? They just stick meat on a {POLAND} drip {GREECE} on it?"
I responded, "Yeah, that stuff can really {SWEDEN} the flavor."
I heard the lunch-man asking a customer: "Do you want this order {TOGO} or should I put it on a {CHINA} plate for you?"
As I was leaving the store that {CHILE} afternoon, I realized that I didn't get any change. {EGYPT} me!
That's OK. I'm just happy to know that my sandwich {ISRAEL}. Authentic food is the only kind {?haiti (I eat)?}!

I have yet to figure out the meaning of the numbers in the story, and so am still at a loss when it comes to the name of the establishment.

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    $\begingroup$ Could L be Mongolia? $\endgroup$
    – PotatoLatte
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 17:06
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Countries:

A. Chile
B. Isle of Man
C. Guyana
D. Ukraine
E. Turkey
F. Sudan
G. Togo
H. Israel
I. Poland
J. China
K. Czech(ia)
L. Jamaica
M. Sweden
N. Russia
O. Hungary
P. Greece
Q. Iran
R. Kenya
S. Egypt

Anecdote:

So I was really {3} Hungary one day, so {3} Iran off to get me a {5} Turkey sandwich.
I told the guy behind the counter,"I don't mean to {3} Russia, but I heard {3} Jamaica really good sandwich here, is that right?"
He said: "{5} Kenya wait a sec? You haven't even taken a number yet!"
There was this {5} Guyana skateboard, wearing a {3} Sudan tie looking at the rotisserie. I said, "I can't see the display. Can {4} Ukraine your neck and {5} Czech what it says?"
He ignored me. "What's this, then? They just stick meat on a {3} Poland drip {5} Greece on it?"
I responded, "Yeah, that stuff can really {2} Sweden the flavor."
I heard the lunch-man asking a customer: "Do you want this order {3} Togo or should I put it on a {3} China plate for you?"
As I was leaving the store that {4} Chile afternoon, I realized that I didn't get any change. {1} Egypt me!
That's OK. I'm just happy to know that my sandwich {2} Israel. Authentic food is the only kind {2} Isle of Man!

If we take the {x} to be

the letter at position x of each country,

we get the following

set of letters: NAESMANDAHLCWGILESS

which could possibly rearrange to

SENEGAL SANDWICH SLAM??

or

Magellan's Sandwiches, based on @Toby Speight's suggestion in previous comments.

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    $\begingroup$ Remark: Sorry everybody, I probably ought to have refreshed this page before posting! $\endgroup$
    – El-Guest
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 16:31
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    $\begingroup$ Personally, I prefer your first suggestion to the second. I don't know why, probably due to the alliteration $\endgroup$
    – m1gp0z
    Commented Jul 17, 2018 at 20:40

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