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Somewhere in this universe, there is an extremely tiny planet covered entirely in water. The only inhabitable surface on The entire planet is a raised Platform that keeps the animals on the planet above the water.

The only living things on this planet are seven peculiar animals. Nobody knows where these creatures came from or how they came to be - be it through magic or some accelerated evolutionary process (you can choose to explain this phenomenon However you like It, it's not important).

The very first creature to appear on the platform was a very sickly cat.
The next animal to appear was a rather detestable and perverted snail.
Then came an asthmatic dragon - (not technically a real animal, but hey this is not technically a real planet either),
and then a hairy leopard,
followed by a morally upright rooster.
The sixth creature to arrive was a tiny, tasty lamb.
The final animal was a very childish earthworm.

Can anyone explain the reason for the existence of this tiny planet?

(This is my first puzzle on this site! I hope I haven't made it too obscure or easy! I'll add hints if necessary.)

Hint 1: I have edited the text to intentionally introduce 4 capitalization mistakes that point to the two hints within.

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    $\begingroup$ Dragon and rooster remind me of the Chinese zodiac. $\endgroup$
    – Gamow
    Commented Nov 18, 2015 at 12:53
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    $\begingroup$ An asthmatic dragon sounds like 'Puff the Magic Dragon' $\endgroup$
    – LowIntHighCha
    Commented Nov 18, 2015 at 12:54
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    $\begingroup$ Also kind of reminds me of Pokémon, but not familiar enough with the series... $\endgroup$
    – APrough
    Commented Nov 18, 2015 at 15:11
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    $\begingroup$ I don't know but I do know that "hirsute panthera" anagrams to "urethra thespian" and couldn't not share that fact. $\endgroup$
    – question_asker
    Commented Nov 18, 2015 at 15:21
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    $\begingroup$ OH! I think this is "the office" (US), but I can't connect all the dots. $\endgroup$
    – Raystafarian
    Commented Nov 18, 2015 at 17:57

3 Answers 3

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As noted above, the answer is the stage but the answers needs explanations of how each "part" matches each "animal" So:

A cat: mews or "mewls". Shakespeare's baby was puking, which makes it a sickly cat

The schoolboy is obviously a snail.

Not sure about the dragon: perhaps the furnace sighing instead of roaring makes it like an asthmatic dragon?

Hairy Leopard is obvious, "bearded like the (leo)pard".

Morally upright rooster: Capon is apparently a castrated rooster, and a judge should be morally upright.

Tiny tasty lamb: lambshanks are tasty, but this mans shanks are shrunk, making it tiny as well as tasty.

Childish earthworm also obvious, it is the "second childhood" and like an earthworm, has no teeth, or eyes.

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  • $\begingroup$ hey there! that's all correct except for the lamb. a clue: i'm more referring to the edible part of the lamb. $\endgroup$
    – AZGreenTea
    Commented Dec 14, 2015 at 1:28
  • $\begingroup$ @AZGreenTea got it. But bear in mind before you accept my answer that I didn't actually figure out the Shakespeare reference. That was Garnow. I only figured out how each "part" applied to your clue. $\endgroup$
    – Richard Roe
    Commented Dec 14, 2015 at 16:14
  • $\begingroup$ It's alright, he's got enough points to go around :P also my puzzle was focusing more on explaining the animal references rather than the context, so in my opinion you got the more important part. $\endgroup$
    – AZGreenTea
    Commented Dec 15, 2015 at 1:35
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"The entire planet is a raised Platform" and "However you like It" point towards

William Shakespeare: the platform is a theater, the play is "As you like it".

The concrete answer is

the beginning monologue "All the world's a stage" of "As you like it" (wikipedia)

Here is the full text:

And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms.
Then, the whining school-boy with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then, a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden, and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then, the justice,
In fair round belly, with a good capon lined,
With eyes severe, and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws, and modern instances,
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

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    $\begingroup$ Impressive, but he said the answer had nothing to do with gaming at all, and Shakespeare is one of all-time's biggest players $\endgroup$
    – DrunkWolf
    Commented Nov 19, 2015 at 11:02
  • $\begingroup$ Ah! I missed the trivia tag. $\endgroup$
    – Engineer Toast
    Commented Nov 19, 2015 at 14:23
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    $\begingroup$ Some of the animal references are obvious (e.g. the snail), but some require a bit more interpretation. Can you provide an explanation of how each animal in the question matches with the quotation above? $\endgroup$
    – GentlePurpleRain
    Commented Nov 19, 2015 at 19:59
  • $\begingroup$ This is the correct answer, but I agree with @GentlePurpleRain! I'll give the tick if you can explain where all the animal references come from (some need a little bit of a leap in logic). $\endgroup$
    – AZGreenTea
    Commented Nov 20, 2015 at 1:26
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    $\begingroup$ @DrunkWolf oopsie, my bad :P $\endgroup$
    – AZGreenTea
    Commented Nov 20, 2015 at 1:26
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I have no idea how far I am from the solution but I like the similarities I found. So, here it is

These are the members of G7 - The Platform;the members are:Canada, France, USA, Italy,Japan, UK, USA; and the Planet is the financial system as a whole: it's fluid, it flows like water from one part of the world to the other

The explanation is:

Very sickly cat - cat in mythology is venerated as a special animal, but in Germany(and other European countries) it is considered as having 7 lives; well sickly one would have only one life and can account only for one country; the Snail - they are eaten in Italy Dragon - It was part of coat of arms in Great Britain, not sure now though; Leopard - maybe it's hairy since it came from the north, Canada Rooster - the term itself originated in USA Lamb and Earthworm - can't find any interesting associations though for >!the last 2: France and Japan

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  • $\begingroup$ I thought the association used for the planet is also not bad :) $\endgroup$
    – user11082
    Commented Nov 20, 2015 at 1:29

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