Dealing with an overseas co-worker who acts like my manager/higher up than me

Question

I work for a large international company based in the USA, where I am a 'posted' overseas manager based in the UK. The company has many overseas branches, such as Canada, Australia, Singapore etc. My direct manager is based in the USA, alongside the head office and the rest of the support team.

Our company has internal titles (Which are only used internally for HR purposes/pay scale) - e.g Specialist II, but an external title which is used everywhere else - e.g Manager, UK Logistics.

I frequently deal with a co-worker back in the USA, who keeps trying to present herself as my manager, or 'higher ranking' than me, particularly when writing emails. She is a co-worker, and is actually an internal grade lower than me (I am Specialist II, she is Specialist I).

When she writes emails to other colleagues and external parties, she consistently refers to me by my internal title (Specialist II), rather than my actual title - Manager, UK Logistics. She will also refer to herself as a 'Duty Manager', when she is more an 'Operations Controller'.

For clarity, my position - Manager, UK Logistics, is responsible for overseeing all operations in the UK. An 'Operations Controller' (her), is responsible for coordinating logistics, e.g the truck with the parcels should go to London at 2pm.

How can I deal with this behavior, as I have noticed it is starting to undermine my position to other external parties? I normally don't include an email signature in my emails, as I find it quite obnoxious especially when it is on every single email - however I will start to include my email signature slowly on my emails.

Would appreciate any other suggestions you may have.

Thank you!

Answer 1

In contrast to Fattie's answer, I think it may be more appropriate to begin with a less aggressive tone, if this is the first occasion on which the matter is being raised.

For example,

"I've received feedback from our clients that they do not clearly understand our respective levels of responsibility, and I think inconsistent and inappropriate use of our pay scale grades may be contributing to this confusion.

From now on please refer to me in external communications only as the UK Logistics Manager. I would not recommend any further use of pay scale titles in external communications.".

From a UK perspective, titles like "Specialist II" are obtuse, non-descript, and uncustomary, but from what I understand they have become a feature of American HR practice of late.

Save the bad-tempered language and copy to the boss for the second time the issue arises, if it does.

Answer 2

I am from the United States.

I have seen this kind of behavior before, thankfully rarely. She is trying to sabotage your role to move herself up the career ladder. Rather than through hard work and skills, she is trying to move ahead through manipulation, and she is deliberately disrespecting you.

Is she in the chain of command below you? I think your post implies that she may have a separate chain of command. She needs to be reported.

I would talk to her directly to address the issue, then follow up with a summary email to her, to document what was just discussed. (People like this will say one thing to your face, then something else to the next person). Then write an email to your boss, with the original email attached, so the situation is fully documented.

Try to nip this behavior in the bud early on. It can get worse. She might try to test what she can get away with initially. If she gets away with minor acts, she may try major acts in the future, until the situation gets out of control.

I wish you luck. And, yes, you should put your title in your email signature. It implies authority, so people will know to have more deference towards you. That, in turn, will help you do your job better, through smoother communications.

Answer 3

So you've provided two specific examples of emails that she's sent out:

1. I am cc'ing in our Specialist II who can shed further light on this
2. You may contact me and the rest of the Duty Manager team if you need further guidance

For #1 I'd probably say something similar. "I am cc'ing in our resident expert on [...] who can shed further light on this". Using your internal title doesn't explain to the customer why you're being looped in but the general idea of the email doesn't sound like a bad one and I certainly don't think she's making herself out to be your manager.

For #2... saying "you may contact the rest of the Duty Manager team" is a bit pointless unless the customer actually has the contact info of everyone on the Duty Manager team. The general idea of the email, however, doesn't sound like a bad one. No where in it is she implying that she's your manager.

So based on the examples you provided I think you're probably reading too much into the emails. I mean, how would you write them differently?

Also, from the customers perspective, if she's their main point of contact for an issue, then, for that specific issue, she kinda is the manager, after a fashion. The customer has needs and its her job to make sure that those needs are met. I mean, I know that when I'm emailing customer support I want to be talking to a confident employee who is going to get my problems solved.

The last thing I want to hear as a customer is stuff like "Let me email our Specialist II and see if it's okay to loop them in on this convo since they know this stuff better than I do". If I got a response like that my confidence in that companies ability to provide adequate support would be shaken. Like seriously, as a customer, I don't care whether or not another employee is "okay" with being looped in. I want you to do whatever it is you have to do to get the issue resolved and if you have to bruise someone's ego to do that, bruise away!

Answer 4

I would privately respond with:

Kelly,

From now on, please refer to me as "Manager, UK Logistics" in our communications with our customers.

Do the same with any of our vendors as well. It's my official title and it's what external parties already know me as. Thank you.

I would email this to her and see what she says. This way, if she ignores this instruction, you have an actual paper trail of your request being ignored.

And yes, you may need to escalate, or you may need to send a second written reminder, but before you escalate, you need to try to handle this on your own first with a direct written request. My apologies if you've tried this already, but your question doesn't tell us what you've tried thus far. And if you've tried this, your question doesn't tell us how she has responded.

And no, as to the difference between 'Duty Manager' and 'Operations Controller', I disagree. To me at least, 'Operations Controller' sounds much more important than 'Duty Manager'.

I also think that 'Duty Manager' would be better for customers to know her by because it implies that her job is to be there for them. It's like when you arrive at a hotel at 2 AM and the only person milling around at that time of the night is the Duty Manager. In my mind, that's not a real manager, that is just the most junior person who drew the shortest end of the straw.

With that said, even if you disagree with my assessment regarding 'duty manager', which is very subjective anyway, I think it would be wise to pick your battles and to only focus on correcting the way she refers to your title. After all, your own title is really what's the most important, and if this issue escalates to management, you don't want to muddy the water with other lesser issues, especially since this kind of person might try to twist your words into something else, and you won't be there to defend yourself if she does.

Answer 5

As a leader based in the US with a lot of Customer Service/Technical Care experience, I think you are reading too much into this.

This is fairly standard vernacular/connotations and is meant to give customers reasurrance.

Duty manager - Gives customers reassurance that someone in charge is handling their issue.

Specialist II - Gives customers confidence that their issue is more complex and is getting attention by an even higher specialist. In the US, companies are notorious for making it hard for people to have any interaction by "teir 2 or tech 2"

I assure you she is getting better customer experience scores than others that don't do this. And, these are the type of things we teach our employees to do. Americans (Karens) love hearing they are being helped by a manager and by teams that are higher up.

Answer 6

Take things slow and be careful. You don't want to do something that you might later regret.

There seems to be a couple of different aspects to your problem that you can deal with separately, rather than trying to solve the whole thing in one swing.

The job title

It seems from your question that there is a company-recognised procedure with job titles. This is a great place to start. Inform your co-worker (in email) that you want her to use your customer-facing title in all correspondences going forward. Start off by making a simple, polite request.

If that fails, follow up with a second, more firm, attempt that you have to insist that she uses your correct title. If this second attempt fails, take it to your manager - no need to follow up further, you have been reasonable enough already at this point. Depending on what your manager says, you may need to escalate it even further if you think it is worth the effort.

Do this first, and await the outcomes before you take any further action regarding her trying to be your manager.

The claim she acts like you manager

I will start by saying that your examples are not good examples. They do no support your claim that she is trying to be your manager, and although others on this site seem to think they are, they definitely won't hold up as any substantial evidence to support a formal complaint against your co-worker.

Keep in mind that "co-worker gossip" isn't your friend. Other people saying "she sounds like your boss" does not prove that she is, nor that she is trying to be.

If you have better examples that you don't want to share, but you feel do support your claim, then it is on you to decide if you feel they will justify and support a formal complaint.

Having said that, the import thing to consider is what you feel you have to gain from making a complaint, and are your superiors likely to agree with your concerns.

Let's assume it's true and she is telling people she is your manager. Does that affect your ability to do your job? Does it affect the companies image and revenue? Does it have a negative impact on the vendors/customers? These are the concerns that the company will have if you raise a complaint, and these will be what motivates them on how they respond.

And perhaps have a bit of self-reflection and ask yourself why do you even care? You know the truth, your superiors know the truth, and by the sounds of it your other co-workers also know she isn't your manager. Don't let it get to you.

If however, there are knock-on effects to your ability to work or to vendor/customer relations, then perhaps you may need to take further action later. But for now, start with addressing the job title concern and go from there.

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Why I think your examples are bad

In case you are wondering why I think your examples are weak here is why. I feel this may be important to help you see a perspective as to why you might be reading too much into them.

'I am cc'ing in our Specialist II who can shed further light on this'

This is essentially just saying: "I am not the best person to help you with this, I will pass this on to our "Specialist II" who is better equipped to help."

If anything, that is suggesting she isn't capable of helping and you are actually more capable. I would take that as a positive to be honest.

'You may contact me and the rest of the Duty Manager team if you need further guidance'

This is simply saying: "If you have any further concerns, please let us know."

Remember the customer contacted her first, so she has to be the one to "take control" of this communication. She can't very well turn around any say "I'm not the right person for this, don't email me again". That would be very unprofessional.

I think somebody commented this already but: put yourself in her position, what would you say in those emails?

Answer 7

Politely and firmly squash the behavior immediately.

The key here is IMMEDIATELY.

Each time it happens, do this:

Email privately the Culprit, Kelly, and, cc'ing your higher manager.

Hi Kelly, you recently wrote to Jim at ClientCo.

In the email you are positioning yourself as a senior manager and as my superior.

This is obviously completely unacceptable for our business. Please do not do this again.

I'm cc'ing Steve to ensure this extremely unbusinesslike behavior is immediately nipped in the bud.

Let's get back to making money for the company. Cheers, Deb.

As is often said on this list "It's not high school".

When someone (Kelly) does something idiotic like this, it's entirely on YOU to IMMEDIATELY fix the issue.

(You know how in personal issues we sometimes talk about being "enablers"! Business is like that but more so. Your question is kind of "not a question": You're identified a problem - well done - fix it. "It's not high school" so as always in business just address issues absolutely directly in the shortest possible language. (Obviously with no emotion, whatsoever: it's a workplace.) Just fix it and move on.)

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† (Just for the record, it obviously goes completely without saying you would never, ever say anything about this in front of a client. This is internal.)

Answer 8

Your co-worker is a potential narcissist. The only way to win the game is not to play it. Smile and wave goodbye.

You can't beat a narcissist unless you're going to up the narc, and that can be a dangerous and potentially draining experience. They are child-like and will drop to a level that most people don't go below. The narc can't actually compete, and trying to point out their flaws will lead to the person screaming foul play and even to a point of accusing someone of sexual discrimination. Boundaries and laws are only good for those who follow them. The person will up the ante, no matter what.