Timeline for Is it appropriate to speak up for a team member who can't drink due to addiction recovery when a company event is being planned?
Current License: CC BY-SA 4.0
7 events
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| Jun 15, 2022 at 13:28 | comment | added | Stuart F | Regarding whether to ask, ideally you should use different methods to gauge how people feel. You could mention in private something like "How do you feel about going to a bar?" without making it too specific, as well as allow more general feedback such as surveys or private emails. Asking people's opinion is difficult because there are always people who'll feel "I don't want to spoil everybody else's fun" and say they're fine with it then just not go. But a manager needs people to be honest with him/her, so a lot of it is about establishing a trust relationship. | |
| Jun 14, 2022 at 12:14 | comment | added | NotThatGuy | Many people with a history of alcohol addiction would be very uncomfortable going to a bar, especially when it seems like they're being forced to go (given that it's a team event), and it seems like they may be pressured to drink (he presumably wouldn't know that you'd stop that, but if people are insistent, that can lead to an uncomfortable situation in any case). If the person already knows you know, asking (in private) whether he'd be comfortable going to a bar seems infinitely better than not asking in case he's uncomfortable with the question. Or ask the whole team, as per another answer. | |
| Jun 14, 2022 at 11:20 | comment | added | Not Entirely Serious | If the person already knows that you know, it might even be helpful to mention privately ahead of time to him that you'll be there to support him in his recovery. Carpooling and arranging some signal about needing to leave early may also help depending on how they are doing in that recovery as well. | |
| Jun 14, 2022 at 9:38 | comment | added | Matthieu M. | @Anthony: And if you go down that route, you may also not want to drink yourself. It's a silent way of showing support, and people may be less likely to call out your report if you're doing the same next to them. | |
| Jun 14, 2022 at 4:25 | history | edited | Job_September_2020 | CC BY-SA 4.0 |
fixing some spelling
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| Jun 13, 2022 at 22:49 | comment | added | Anthony | A good point about supporting him. The hot question recently about how to respond to teammates calling another pussy who wont drink is a good reminder... | |
| Jun 13, 2022 at 22:45 | history | answered | Job_September_2020 | CC BY-SA 4.0 |