"I fantasize about my ex at times..."

Query: I love my husband but I feel guilty for fantasizing about my ex. I miss certain things he used to do to make me feel loved and wanted, not just sexually but in other small gestures too. I have all the comforts in my present life but there’s no passion. I know my husband cares for me and I care for him too and I wouldn’t want to do anything to wreck our relationship but I feel lonely and unloved deep within.
Response by Dr. Jaya Sukul, Clinical Psychologist, QRG Psychologist, QRG Super Speciality Hospital: I think the both of you need to sit down and communicate. You both are operating on presumptions while desiring the same things. Unless we discuss and share our dissatisfaction we won’t be able to fulfill each other’s needs. Without fear and judgment, discuss your needs with your partner and ask them what they need to feel more fulfilled in this relationship. Once you both know what the other person desires, try to take action on it. Only when we love unconditionally are we able to feel loved. Be assured nobody is doing anything harmful, the distance can be bridged with communication.