Lakshmi Ramachandran, PhD

In a workshop I conducted on active listening, a participant asked, how do we listen when we are just communicating via messages/emails in a hybrid setting? Now this is a valid question, as typed messages seldom carry the right (amount of) emotion needed to communicate the point clearly. This is where it is important to elevate listening skills to beyond what is said, to what is not said. Few ways to do this would be to 1) Clarify whether you have understood the message correctly, before responding. 2) Secondly, ask for a call to clarify where possible. 3) Lastly, do not let rising emotions or judgements interfere with listening. Listen, Clarify, and Respond Sharing my recent newsletter that addresses this: https://l1nk.dev/Ikb8M

Adding an important, often underrated factor to effective problem solving: Understanding and defining the problem: It is important to understand, define and communicate the problem effectively, before starting to solve the problem. We need the best solution, not any solution. Critical and creative thinking, brainstorming ideas, evaluating the ideas and implementing the best one are all great steps to problem solve. But sometimes one can get too caught up in the problem, feeling stuck. In my experience, stepping out of the problem and seeking a different perspective helps. The most helpful question to ask is 'what else?'

As a leader, have the openness and a framework ( 3-4 specific questions as in the examples below) to ask for feedback from your team. This is not just about a 360 assessment. But asking team members feedback on 1) How best to work together, 2) How much more or less direction they require from you, and 3) Whether their voice and ideas are heard. Finally, do acknowledge, thank, probe more using coaching style, and take action on the feedback. This will not only help you become a better leader, but also establish a culture of healthy feedback in your team.

One of my biggest realizations in giving and receiving feedback is to consider whether the recipient is ready for it. Always seek permission before giving feedback and set up a convenient time for this. This helps the recipient be more receptive and prepared for the feedback. Secondly, no doubt that the feedback needs to be specific and supported with evidence. Unless the feedback recipient knows exactly what to do, the feedback has no value, and may even diminish the recipients confidence. Lastly, give feedback with respect, empathy and genuine care. Allow space for the recipient to share their perspectives and help them align with action towards the feedback. A feedback can make or break someone's confidence. What would you choose?

How to establish authority as a new leader without coming across as aggressive?. This was the question a new leader I recently met was grappling with. Clearly understandable, with one of the team members being indifferent, and another senior in terms of age and experience within the organisation. The key nugget that emerged from this coaching conversation to establish authority without micromanagement or aggressiveness was to 1) Set professional boundaries (be friendly, but not friends at work) 2) Gain trust from the team members through competence and confidence 3) Know that you don't need to know everything 4) Trust the team members' expertise, and enable them to take ownership for their work 4) Create a positive work culture

First and foremost, what's the definition of a perfectionist? As per the American Psychologists Association, perfectionism is the tendency to demand of others or of oneself a 'flawless' level of performance. The reason why it is unhealthy is because it stems from a desire to avoid failure or harsh judgment. This not only causes internal stress, but also micromanagement tendencies in leaders, leading to a dip in individual and team performance. It is therefore important for leaders to become aware of perfectionism and where it is coming from. The way to overcome perfectionism is to shift towards excellence, where the focus is on putting forth one's best through efforts, allowing for and learning from mistakes, while enjoying the process.