Actually, This Is Possible
Your character has the aspect "red hair, but only in situations where this would not be distressing for AncientSwordRage".
If someone tries to compel this aspect and you find it distressing, you can point out that you find it distressing and therefore the aspect doesn't apply here.
(Presumably the character always has red hair, but this is only an aspect in certain situations and therefore can only be compelled in those situations.)
Arguably, this is the only way to word the aspect that will work for you, because this is the only way that expresses that you don't know in advance what will be distressing for you and you're going to need to adjudicate it in-game.
But Please Don't Do This
Other players will find it unpleasant to try to interact with this aspect, because every time they touch it they'll have to pause and ask your permission and check if they're distressing you. Your GM will also have this problem.
A safety tool says: "In this moment, my emotional status is so urgent that it trumps whatever you are feeling or doing. It's okay to take you out of the game, and end whatever fun you were having, because my needs are more important and we need to make sure those needs are met first."
And it's okay to use that safety tool, if you need to. But you should recognize that it's unpleasant for other players when they get safety tools used against them, and you should try to respect their needs by not deliberately putting them in a position where that's going to happen frequently.