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I'm a casual member of SO and am not a moderator, although some algorithms do seem to have granted me certain priviliges over time.

I have read a recent blog post by Sara Chipps titled "Iterating on Inclusion". It describes changes to Stack Overflow's policies, all of which sound fine, but I'm a little unclear on what these mean for me.

For example, the changes to the "No Bigotry" comment seem to imply that the incorrect use of pronouns will be considered a form of bigotry:

This section:

No bigotry.

We don’t tolerate any language likely to offend or alienate people based on race, gender, sexual orientation, or religion — and those are just a few examples. When in doubt, just don’t.

“No bigotry”

is now:

No bigotry.

We don’t tolerate any language likely to offend or alienate people based on race, gender, sexual orientation, or religion — and those are just a few examples. Use stated pronouns (when known). When in doubt, don’t use language that might offend or alienate.

I love that you want to build an inclusive and respectful environment for everyone. Incidentally, I had a discussion on bigotry on another SE site a few years ago, from which I was hugely disappointed in their community and as a result have almost completely withdrawn from the English Language & Usage Site, so it's great to see SE being proactive about it.

But what does including incorrect use of pronouns in the definition of bigotry mean for me in practice, and who does this new policy apply to?

I rarely (never) read users' profiles and am unlikely to exert any effort in discovering a user's pronoun preference before responding to them. More likely than not I'll use their username or, if I'm not making a conscious effort to not be biased, I'll probably assume they're male and go with "he".

Is it just for employees / active moderators? One obvious solution here is for me to stop using pronouns, but having lived through the awkward pronoun-avoidance dance in my native German, I don't really look forward to that experience in English.

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  • 4
    related on MSE: What does the Code of Conduct say about pronouns?
    – rene
    Commented Dec 31, 2019 at 14:31
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    That blog post serves a very different purpose than it portends. Operative pronouns in an SO post comment are "you" and "I", there is never a good reason to talk about somebody else behind their back.
    – Hans Passant
    Commented Dec 31, 2019 at 14:32
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    Rewind meta a few months and look at pretty much every post in the code-of-conduct tag. This subject has been hashed and rehashed. Downvote for lack of research... :P
    – Heretic Monkey
    Commented Dec 31, 2019 at 15:45
  • @HereticMonkey I googled it but didn't get anywhere, then I pretty much have up. Frankly I don't care enough to do my own research so the downvotes are probably fair. I'm still a bit confused but I think the answer helps a little!
    – quant
    Commented Dec 31, 2019 at 18:53
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    There used to be a FAQ on Meta Stack Exchange but the changes have been so unpopular it got deleted.
    – BSMP
    Commented Jan 1, 2020 at 7:15
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    @HereticMonkey to be fair, there was a lot of talk and it's hard to separate the signal from the noise
    – Itamar Mushkin
    Commented Jan 1, 2020 at 10:19
  • @BSMP does that mean the article is moot?
    – quant
    Commented Jan 1, 2020 at 21:44
  • I don't think it's moot; it was mostly a longer version of the two answers below. I think the only thing it had that isn't implied by the answers here is that this currently only applies to networks sites whose primary language is English. Most of the FAQ was just, "Yes, this applies to you", "No, that isn't an exception", "No, neither is that", and "Don't start talking like a robot/alien to avoid using the correct pronouns".
    – BSMP
    Commented Jan 2, 2020 at 7:51
  • The official FAQ on Meta Stack Exchange is the link posted in the first comment, by rene. The deleted FAQ people mention was an earlier version. It received an extreme amount of noise in answers, comments, and red flags, and cleaning it up was apparently considered too much effort for too little gain. meta.stackexchange.com/questions/336374/…
    – sourcejedi
    Commented Jan 22, 2020 at 17:26

2 Answers 2

Reset to default
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Without looking at users' profiles, you can just default to "they" instead of "he", or use their username.
And if you make a mistake that someone asks you to correct, just do so.
That should be all, no need to dance to avoid pronouns.

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if I'm not making a conscious effort to not be biased, I'll probably assume they're male and go with "he"

Therein lies the problem.

My advice: make a conscious effort, and keep doing it until it becomes

if I'm not making a conscious effort to not be biased, I'll probably assume gender neutral and go with "they", until asked to go with something else

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    I'll try to make more of an effort.
    – quant
    Commented Jan 4, 2020 at 13:59

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