Late Night With Seth Meyers

"NASCAR is doing more to lead right now than the President of the United States."

"More Americans are coming around to the idea that maybe, just maybe, electing a racist Diet Coke-stained beanbag chair wasn't the best idea."

"We're living through a moment of national crisis unprecedented in our lifetimes."

"We can do pretty much whatever we want." Yes, Trump really said it.

"That worst case scenario is here."

"The very least we could do — the absolute minimum — is to acknowledge that there is a deeply rooted, systemic problem here."

"All play and no work makes Don the greatest."

"I'm really having a hard time wrapping my head around this."

"Stop trying to make Obamagate happen."

"That's their scam: make government incompetent, then use that incompetence as proof that government is bad."

"How could you not trust the guy who said he would kill the coronavirus, that cases would go down to zero, that it would go away in April...?"

"We're not losers!"

Trump's Mother's Day message mentioned fighter jets more often than mothers.

"Don't accept the false dichotomy between staying locked down and reopening the economy."

"He's incapable of empathy. He only has two emotions: boredom and rage."

"If we can't remember when presidents do bad things, then more presidents are going to come along and do more bad things."

"A Fox host with no medical expertise is directly advising the president on a deadly pandemic."

"We're like a week away from Trump announcing the first annual Hunger Games."

"It's never supposed to cover your eyes unless you're thinking about 50 Shades of Grey."

"When Nike says 'Just Do It,' they don't mean mass murder."

"Some people were still holding out hope that when s**t got serious Trump would get serious, when in reality it was clear he would just be s**t."

"He sounds like a guy on a date getting lines through an earpiece and the feed just cut out."

"I think you're confusing a press conference with a party of some kind."

"It's better NOT to be governed by sociopaths."

"Breathe easy everyone — Lenny Kravitz is in the clear."