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Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

###A good answer will:

A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

###A bad answer will:

A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

###A stellar answer might:

A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

##Results

Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

###A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

###A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

###A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

##Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

replaced http://stackoverflow.com/ with https://stackoverflow.com/
Source Link

Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

###A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

###A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

###A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tagsmy tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

##Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

###A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

###A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

###A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

##Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

Often, I find myself running a script or query that will take a significant amount of time to run. I can leave that script open and enjoy some guilt-free procrastination.

Now, what if I could write a script that seems to be one of the above scripts to any onlookers, but in looks only? I could put it up on a screen and enjoy days of kitten livestreams before anyone realised that all the complicated rigmarole on the screen didn't have anything to do with my actual job.

Your challenge is to write this script for me (yes, I'm that lazy).

###A good answer will:

  • Make something appear on the screen that looks like a script is doing work. "Screen" can be terminal, browser, etc.
  • Be fairly original (yes, we've all seen the neverending progress bar programs)
  • Survive cursory examination by a technical person

###A bad answer will:

  • Get me fired
  • Rehash something we all were forwarded in the 90's

###A stellar answer might:

  • Transcend one of the bad bullet points above (for instance)
  • Survive critical examination
  • *gasp* actually do something that's useful or aids in my work shirking

Acceptance will be based on votes, with bonus from real-life results. I will actually run these scripts (Linux Mint 16) at work when my screen is visible (meetings and the like) to determine detection. If anyone notices that it's faking, you're out of the running. If someone comments on how hard I'm working, +5 bonus upvotes for you.

"Useful" in this case can apply to any coder, but if you're looking for that extra shine on your teacher-bound apple, I'm a full-stack webdev who works in code roughly according to my tags.

Question partially inspired by this.

##Results

Disappointingly, I didn't get any comments either way on these entries. They're all awesome, so you're all winners in my heart. However, Loktar has the most votes by a long shot, so he gets the +15 from the accept. Congrats!

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Post Reopened by aditsu quit because SE is EVIL, The Guy with The Hat, qwr, mniip, Mohammad
Post Closed as "Needs more focus" by Howard, Martin Ender, Peter Taylor, user16402, ProgramFOX
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